The Island Blotter

San Juan County Sheriff's Log — Powered by dad humor

Source: Islands Sounder

Week of Aug 12

A Friday Harbor shoplifter's debut in security camera footage wasn't quite the breakthrough moment they were hoping for; they were booked into jail for third-degree theft after denying involvement despite video evidence.

Aug 13, 2024 Friday Harbor Theft
Week of Aug 5

A Lopez resident reported a stolen kayak from the marina, and the investigation is paddling along—no suspect in sight yet.

Aug 11, 2024 Theft

An Orcas deputy investigated a theft, which we can only assume was someone's prized collection of something very important to them.

Aug 7, 2024 Theft

A San Juan deputy located a suspect vehicle and recovered 18 campaign signs, proving that sign theft is definitely not a platform we endorse.

Aug 7, 2024 Theft
Week of Dec 12

Someone stole a street sign on San Juan, proving that the only thing more elusive than a street sign is whoever took it, as deputies had no workable leads or suspects at the time.

Dec 12, 2022 Theft

A San Juan market manager called in a shoplifter they'd caught on camera, and a trespass warning letter was issued—because nothing says "please don't steal from us again" quite like official paperwork.

Dec 12, 2022 Theft
Week of Nov 28

A San Juan deputy took a theft report from sometime in the last three months, which is a wide window for someone to have really committed to the heist.

Nov 30, 2022 Theft
Week of Jan 2

Friday Harbor experienced a theft, though the suspect apparently believed in the "no witnesses, no crime" philosophy; investigators are open to other theories.

Jan 6, 2017 Friday Harbor Theft
Week of Nov 21

A Friday Harbor resident discovered that an uninvited guest had made a withdrawal from their home that the bank definitely didn't authorize, and deputies are currently investigating who made this unauthorized transfer.

Nov 22, 2016 Friday Harbor Theft

A San Juan Island theft was documented and politely handed off to another agency, because nothing says "your problem now" quite like an informational report.

Nov 22, 2016 San Juan Island Theft

A deputy took a stolen vehicle report on Orcas Island—looks like someone decided to take a joyride without asking permission, and now we're playing the world's least fun game of hide-and-seek with a car.

Nov 22, 2016 Orcas Island Theft
Week of Nov 14

A Friday Harbor business theft was resolved when the suspect realized that paying for items is actually how retail works, and all charges were dropped faster than the merchandise was grabbed.

Nov 18, 2016 Friday Harbor Theft

A Lopez deputy took a report of stolen guitar strings—or possibly the whole instrument. Either way, someone's day just became a lot less melodic.

Nov 17, 2016 Theft

A Lopez Island resident got identity-jacked by someone apparently calling from the Middle East, but our vigilant bank caught the suspicious transaction and shut it down before any real damage was done. No loss, and the suspect remains roughly 6,000 miles away and equally uncooperative.

Nov 17, 2016 Lopez Island Theft

An Eastsound resident reported her vehicle stolen by a family member who apparently decided a ferry ride to the mainland was cheaper than asking for the keys.

Nov 17, 2016 Eastsound Theft

A Friday Harbor resident learned an expensive lesson about unlocked vehicles: they're basically a vending machine for thieves, except the machine also takes your dignity.

Nov 16, 2016 Friday Harbor Theft